Essential Oils for the first Trimester

So here’s the thing. During my first pregnancy I was not into essential oils. I was barely out of high school and had no idea who I was yet as a person. I did know at that point that I wasn’t a fan of doctors, hospital or medication though- which is part of the reason why I didn’t find out I was pregnant until I was way into my second trimester and getting really sick. But this time around I am older and I have grown into who I am. I know that I enjoy a natural approach to medicine and that essential oils are something I have been working with specifically for 5, almost 6 years now for myself, my family, and those around me. What I hadn’t done thus far was learn about essential oils for during pregnancy, and this was a daunting aspect for me since I found out very quickly that my first OBGYN wasn’t going to be any help and that I was now in a situation where I was going to need medication and I had no one to help point me in the right direction. My husband and I had been struggling for the past 4 years with conceiving, and so I had a little experience with what I could and couldn't use, but now that I actually was pregnant things were different.
If you are looking for essential oils that can help increase your fertility, click here.

**Before I get started letting you all know what I took, let me start with a quick disclosure notice, because essential oils in general, and the products I am about to mention are not FDA regulated. So let me confirm that I am not a doctor, or a chemist, or a prenatal specialist of any kind. No one is paying me to write what I am writing, and none of these facts have been checked by the FDA. What I will do is provide links to articles and additional material so that you can do your own research. The information given in this post is not meant to take the place of doctor treatment or recommendations and I always recommend that you ask your doctor before trying anything new. Essential oils, just like many other things can interfere with medications and treatments and should not be used without your doctors’ consent.**

STEP 1: The first thing I did was make sure that what I was using was legit. – Most therapeutic or essential oils out there are total BS because essential oils do not fall into a category that is FDA regulated. So I did my research and was pleased to find that not only were the oils I was using as pure as pure could get, but a lot of the accusations online about people saying things about the products not working or being dangerous were also debunked. Whew! … but that was only step 1. I do want to mention for those of you reading this that you will see me mention using some of these essential oils internally, and depending on what companies you use this is probably not a possibility. If you are interested in using the same company and products as are listed throughout this blog, I can help you with a free consultation; I’ll leave my contact at the bottom of this post.

Another thing I did was to find myself another OBGYN who was at least willing to help guide me in the right direction when it came to holistic health, and contact a Douala and a midwife.

Step 2 was to find out what I absolutely could not take, and the list is quite long and is not the same on every site. I decided to play it safe and avoid any essential oil listed on any of the sites just in case, and I am going to provide you with the list I compiled right here:

Basil

Birch (sweet)

Buchu

Calamus

Camphor (brown or yellow)

Cassia

Cedarwood

*Cinnamon

*Clary sage (OK during labour)

Clove

Coriander

Cypress (OK after 5 months)

Fennel

Hyssop

Jasmine (OK during labour)

Juniper

Lavender

Lemongrass

Mugwort

Myrrh

Nutmeg

Origanum

Parsley (in large doses)

Peppermint

Pennyroyal

*Rosemary

Sweet marjoram

Tansy (blue)

Thyme

Wintergreen

Wormwood
Yarrow

There were a few exceptions to the oils I avoided from this list, but before even thinking of using I researched a ton online, and checked with my doctor, doula, and midwife. This is me not trusting anyone and needing to hear it from 6-7 different sources before I accept it as a truth.

* These oils are not to be messed around with under any circumstances. They cause contractions and will make you go into labor early and or possibly lose your child.

Step 3: Start using the products and seeing what worked for me

Here are the essential oils I used:

1. Peppermint: (Let me address that peppermint was an oil I found listed on a few sites as not being safe to use during pregnancy. I asked both OBGYN doctors I had and their entire staffs along with my douala and midwife and they all said this is BS and that peppermint is perfectly safe to use while pregnant and often times is prescribed for women struggling with heartburn or nausea during this time.- of course check with your doctor first; I'm just saying I haven't found any reason for this to be on the not approved list.) I took this literally everywhere with me. My first pregnancy gave me horrible nausea vomiting heartburn and indigestion (yes I had a girl), so I was petrified of that happening again. Peppermint helps with more than just tummy issues though. This pregnancy had me exhausted all the time, and Peppermint helps give you a boost of energy. Plus the best part is that after I pigged out of pickles, ice cream, and buffalo chicken dip, I could get the nasty combo smells off my breath. -There is also a super cute beadlet version of this oil which contains only ¼ of a drop and is really easy for on-the-go use.

2. Serenity: This a blend of oils of which none fell into the “do not use category” that promotes relaxation and sleep. (I tried to make sure I was using a variety of oils so that I wouldn’t use too much of just 1 and possibly use too much and you’ll notice later that I used lavender for a few things, so this was a great way to reduce some of my lavender use). It is a blend of lavender flower, cedarwood, ho wood leaf, ylang ylang flower, marjoram leaf, roman chamomile flower, vetiver root, vanilla bean absolute, and Hawaiian sandalwood. I diffused this at night to help me sleep because for whatever reason that seemed to be the only time I couldn’t fall asleep. – There is also a serenity bath bar which is just a soap bar infused with this oil, that is great for evening showers for yourself (or to wash your kids in if you’re a stay at home mom so both you and the kiddos reap the benefits).

3. Roman Chamomile: This is another great oil for helping to promote relaxation and sleep. Now don’t get me wrong I was constantly getting tired during the day and literally falling asleep everywhere, anytime I had more than 5 minutes to myself, but when it came to sleeping at night I have always struggled, and now that I was even more limited than normal as to what I could and could not take, It was really important for me to find out what would help. Chamomile is a soothing and relaxing oil that I like to blend into hot water for tea. I did not use this very often, but when I had the chance for a nice cup of tea and some meditation time before bed, this was a go to favorite of mine.

4. Grapefruit: Oh the dreaded baby acne. During my first pregnancy I didn’t experience this at all, my skin was so clear, and I had no idea how lucky I was. This second time around I’ve got gray hairs and acne everywhere, I’m like a grandmother going through puberty. HAHAHA! Grapefruit is was helped me out big time with the acne I was experiencing. Grapefruit oil’s antibacterial properties have a positive effect on the skin, which help fight bacteria that cause acne, and its antibacterial properties help to keep the pores clear of additional bacteria.

5. Lavender: I used lavender along with grapefruit for my face neck and shoulder acne issues. Lavenders anti-inflammatory properties help to reduce redness, swelling and irritation from acne and its antibacterial properties and can kill bacteria that penetrate your pores, making it perfect for preventing and also healing acne.

Additional essential oil infused products I used:

1. Stretch Mark Prevention. Yes I homemade mine because I am never sure about what is actually in the lotion, moisturizers, and body butters out there. The recipe for my “Baby Belly Butter” is:

1 cup raw shea butter

1 cup cocoa butter

1 cup coconut oil

1 TBS argon oil

1 TBS rose hip oil

1TBS vitamin E oil

20 drops melaleuca

20 drops Frankincense

20 drops Lavender

Heat shea butter, cocoa butter, and coconut oil in a double boiler until liquid then remove from heat and add the rest of the ingredients, mix and store in a glass jar.

If you want to use a store bought body butter that’s fine too, but here’s why you want to add these three essential oils:

• Melaleuca aka Tea Tree: This oil is great for skin.  This baby belly butter is thick and can make you break out even more so than just pregnancy breakouts. That’s one of the reasons I added the melaleuca. Because of its anti-inflammatory and antiseptic properties, helps reduce skin redness, irritation, and swelling. The oil is a powerful solvent, which means it breaks the oil, dirt, and debris that builds up under our skin and clogs up our pores. It also helps to strengthen skin, and heal cuts which helps to add to the prevention of stretch marks.
• Frankincense: Frankincense is known as the King of oils. It has so many amazing benefits, not only for the skin, but for the entire body. Specifically for the skin, its ability to revive and rejuvenate the skin makes it wonderful for reducing the appearance of wrinkles, stretch marks, and scars, preventing acne, and healing minor wounds. Aside from just skin health it can help de-stress, and relax the body (which was perfect since I would apply this cream at night and sleeping through the night was always an issue for me). Frankincense is also an anti-inflammatory oil which I actually needed a lot of. I experienced so many aches and pains in my hips, and knees, that I was taking anti-inflammatories daily. Frankincense is also great for dental health, but I’ll come back to that a little later when I discuss toothpaste.  Lastly Frankincense rejuvenates and supports and encourages cellular function. Meaning that new little one you’ve got growing inside you that is trying to piece together all of its cells and their functions is going to get a little extra help from this oil as well as Mama, who is getting the benefits of healthy functioning organs.
• Lavender: (this was another oil mentioned on the do not use list, which was approved for me to use) I mentioned that I normally used this baby belly butter at night and this was for a few reasons. 1. Its thick and takes a little time to dry so you don’t want to be wearing your nice going out in public clothes, PJs are best. 2. Two of the essential oils that I picked that are really great for skin health are also great for relaxation. Lavender is known for helping to relieve stress and anxiety as well as promoting restfulness and relaxation which I really needed at night since that seemed to be the only time I couldn’t fall asleep. The anti-inflammatory properties also helped me with my joint pain in my hips and knees as well. Lavender is known for healing injured skin from burns, cuts, and scrapes, because of its abilities to quickly heal skin. This come sin great for helping to prevent those stretch marks.

2. Replenishing Body Butter: For those of you who aren’t big into DIYing like me, or just don’t have the time, this is a great baby belly butter base, or even one to be used on its own. The base of this natural butter combines shea and cocoa seed butters, known for their deep moisturization and ability to promote skin suppleness. Jojoba seed oil absorbs quickly into the skin and helps keep skin looking hydrated while avocado oil provides essential fatty acids to nourish and soften skin. Essential oils of Wild Orange, Douglas Fir, and Frankincense turn this into an intensely aromatic spa experience while providing purifying, rejuvenating, and stretch mark reducing benefits.

3. LLV: LLV stands for Life Long Vitality which is a 3-part multi-vitamin. Personally, I am not a fan of prenatal vitamins because of the size of them and the fact that you have to take them with food (sometimes I don’t have an appetite first thing in the morning, but I still need to take my vitamins before I leave the house). The LLV has a “tummy tamer” blend in all three parts which allows you to be able to take them without food. I also liked this because it came as a vegan option, and although I am not a vegan most baby books will tell you to try to get as much of your nutrition from raw plants, so this seemed like the perfect fit for me. Now I was taking these before I was pregnant so by the time I was pregnant I was taking the full dose which is 2 of each vitamin 2 times a day. If you are looking to try a new multivitamin, I suggest starting at a ½ dose and working you way up because it can be a lot al at once.

Part1- Vegan Microplex MVZ: This formula includes a balanced blend of essential antioxidant vitamins A, C, and E, and an energy complex of B vitamins presented in a patented glycoprotein matrix. It also contains chelated minerals including calcium, magnesium, and zinc for optimal bone and metabolic health, and is encapsulated using sodium lauryl sulfate-free vegetable capsules

Part 2- Alpha CRS+: This is a proprietary formula combining potent levels of natural botanical extracts that support healthy cell function with important metabolic factors of cellular energy. It is to be used as a comprehensive dietary supplement foundation for a lifetime of vitality and wellness.

Part 3- vEO Mega: This is a revolutionary, 100 percent vegetarian-friendly formula blending CPTG Certified Pure Therapeutic Grade essential oils with natural, plant-sourced essential fatty acids.

* Vegan Microplex MVZ does include Folate, but I did take an additional Folic Acid supplement

4. HD Clear Foaming Face Wash: So I mentioned before that I was using some essential oils to help reduce my acne, but a good facewash is always useful when fighting breakouts. HD Clear Foaming Face Wash is an exclusive and natural formula containing plant extracts known to improve the look and feel of skin. Designed with essential oils, it thoroughly cleanses skin with melaleuca (tea tree), eucalyptus, geranium, litsea, and ho wood essential oils, each renowned for their purification properties. This also contains an active licorice root extract, for clear, healthy looking skin, while white willow bark promotes a clear, smooth complexion. Additionally, it nourishes and soothes the skin with amino acids and helped keep my skin feeling and looking great.

Salon Essential Shampoo and Conditioners: There are so many chemicals in your hair care products, so I have done natural shampoos for quite some time. The problem is that Rosemary is a great oil for hair and many natural shampoos and conditioners contain it, in addition most natural dandruff hair care contains mentha (peppermint, spearmint, wintergreen or a mixture of these) and wintergreen is also an oil you should avoid. I went with this shampoo because it’s a natural shampoo that has a complementary conditioner that protects and strengthens hair without any oils that might interfere with baby.

5. Toothpaste: So we know that once pregnant everyone is constantly reminding us that oral health is so important, and while it can seem like a weird thing to prioritize, your oral health is super important and you should make sure to have at least one dentist visit during your pregnancy. Unfortunately, the natural toothpaste I normally use has rosemary, cinnamon, clove and myrrh so it was a bit out of the question for me to use:

4TBS coconut oil

3TBS baking soda

20 drops peppermint

20 drops frankincense

Heat your coconut oil in a double boiler to liquify, then add your other ingredients mix and store in glass jar or approved plastic squeeze tube. (another option is to include orange essential oil.) https://draxe.com/homemade-baking-soda-toothpaste/

• Frankincense: Thanks to its antiseptic properties, frankincense essential oil is a natural solution to fighting the bacteria in the mouth that can cause plaque and bad breath. This can help prevent tooth decay and oral infections. Frankincense essential oil can be added to mouthwash and toothpaste to keep gums healthy.
• Peppermint: Along with the fact that it freshens your breath and gives you a minty fresh feeling in your mouth after using it, peppermint oil displayed antimicrobial activities against oral pathogens, including Staphylococcus aureus, Enterococcus fecalis, Escherichia coli and Candida albicans.
• Orange: Because orange oil has the ability to fight bacterial growth, it can help to protect teeth and gums from infections. It’s also been used to help ease a sore throat for fast relief when gargled with water and salt.

6. Mouthwash: In addition to brushing and flossing, mouthwash can be important as well. The formula is safe and gentle for everyone. Not all mouthwashes are made the same- did you know that Listerine was originally created as a floor cleaner and when they rebranded as a mouth wash, the formula was not even updated?!?!?!?! Some mouthwashes that contain alcohol can dry out your mouth and combat your natural mouthwash—your saliva—from doing its job. Any mouthwash that says it kills 99% of germs is doing your mouth a disservice! If you struggle with dry mouth at all, it is important to use an alcohol-free option. Fortunately, I made my own for years with just water and peppermint.  

1 cup water 

10 drops peppermint 

Store in a glass jar or vial with lid

The 1 cup to 10 drops is the ratio I used, but you are welcome to increase or decrease that depending on how minty you’d like, and you can also add frankincense if you would like.

For a video on how to make this toothpaste and mouthwash, click this link:

https://youtu.be/0GAHdK8ZatY

Here are a list of oils and what they can help with:

• Bergamot-Analgesic, antiseptic, antidepressant, uplifting, and refreshing. Helpful for cystitis during pregnancy.
• Chamomile-Antiseptic, analgesic, anti-inflammatory and antispasmodic. Soothes pain from muscular aches, headaches, toothaches and indigestion.
•  Cypress-(OK after 5 months) Antiseptic, antispasmodic, astringent and diuretic. Helpful for varicose veins, hemorrhoids and swollen ankles.
• Eucalyptus-Antiseptic, antibiotic, analgesic, anti-inflammatory, antiviral. Helpful with respiratory congestion.
• Frankincense-Antiseptic, astringent, sedative, warming.
•  Geranium-(OK after 3 months) Antiseptic, antidepressant, astringent, refreshing, uplifting. Eases aching legs and is good for poor circulation.
• Grapefruit-Astringent, digestive aid, lymphatic stimulant. Helps with water retention.
• Lavender-Antiseptic, antibiotic, analgesic, antidepressant, healing, relaxing. Helps soothe aches and pains of pregnancy, encourages cell renewal and helps with fluid retention.
• Lemon-Antiseptic, antibacterial, antifungal, astringent, stimulant, tonic. Useful as an inhalant for morning sickness and in massage for varicose veins.
• Mandarin-Antiseptic, refreshing, tonic, mild relaxant. Can ease fluid retention in leg and ankle massages.
• Neroli-Antiseptic, antidepressant, antispasmodic, anti-inflammatory, relaxing. Useful in pregnancy to promote healthy skin cell regeneration and for easing nervous tension.
• Patchouli-Antiseptic, antidepressant, anti-inflammatory, nerve sedative. Eases confusion, indecision and apathy.
• Peppermint- helps alleviate nausea, heartburn, and indigestion. Gives a short term energy boost.
• Petitgrain-Antiseptic, antidepressant, sedative, refreshing, tonic. Helpful in dealing with pre or postpartum depression.
• Rosewood-Antiseptic, sedative.
• Sandalwood-Antiseptic, anti-inflammatory, antidepressant, sedative. Helpful for cystitis during pregnancy.
• Tangerine-Antispasmodic, lymphatic stimulant, calming, sedative. Helps to prevent stretch marks.
• Tea Tree-Antibiotic, antiseptic, antifungal, antiviral, disinfectant. Can be used to treat thrush during pregnancy.
• Ylang Ylang-Antiseptic, antidepressant, aphrodisiac, sedative, lowers blood pressure. Restorative when overworked or tense.

Here are a list of potential first trimester issues and how to help treat them:

• Anxiety/Tension: Lavender, ylang ylang, melissa, or myrrh. Diffuse or dilute and rub on back of neck, temples, chest, shoulders, back or reflex points on the feet.
• Breasts: Lavender (soothes), geranium (soothes), Roman chamomile (sore nipples), or fennel (tones). (Caution: Fennel should not be used for more than 10 days, as it will excessively increase flow through the urinary tract.) Add 3-5 drops to 1Tbs. carrier oil, and massage on location.
• Energy Blend: Combine 2 drops Roman chamomile, 2 drops geranium, and 2 drops lavender in 2 tsp. carrier oil, and massage into the skin.
• Hemorrhaging: Helichrysum. Apply 1-3 drops on lower back to help prevent hemorrhaging.
• High Blood Pressure: Ylang ylang, eucalyptus, lavender, clover, clary sage, or lemon. Diffuse or dilute as recommended and apply on location, on reflex points on feet and hands, and over heart. (Note: Avoid rosemary, thyme, and possibly peppermint.) Bath: Place 3 drops ylang ylang in bathwater, and bathe in the evening twice a week. Blend: Combine 5 drops gernaium, 8 drops lemongrass, and 3 drops lavender in 1 oz. carrier oil. Rub over heart and on reflex points on left foot and hand.
• Miscarriage (After): Frankincense, grapefruit, geranium, lavender, or Roman chamomile. Dilute 5-6 drops in 1 Tbs. carrier oil, and massage on back, legs, and arms. Add 3-4 drops to warm bathwater, and bathe. - For more information on the use of essential oils for the pain and grief of a miscarraige, click here.
• Morning Sickness: Ginger or peppermint. Dilute and apply 1-3 drops on ears, down jaw bone, and on reflex points on the feet. Place 1-3 drops of ginger in empty capsule with 1-3 drops of olive oil; swallow capsule. Diffuse into the air, inhale directly from bottle, or apply oil to hands, tissue, or cotton ball, and inhale.
• Preeclampsia (see also High Blood Pressure above): Cypress. Diffuse or dilute 1:1 in carrier oil, and apply 1-2 drops on bottoms of feet and on abdomen.
• Self Love: Joyful Blend. Diffuse into the air or wear as perfume.

If you want to learn more about any of these products or about an essential oil company that has Certified Pure Therapeutic Grade essential oils, that are safe for internal, expecting mothers, and infant and toddler safe you can comment on this blog, visit my website www.beyoutfit.com, or find me on Facebook @Colleen Faye.

References:

https://www.doterra.com/US/en/blog/spotlight-lavender-oil

https://www.doterra.com/US/en/blog/spotlight-peppermint-oil

https://www.doterra.com/US/en/blog/spotlight-frankincense-oil

https://www.gurunanda.com/blogs/essential-oils/melaleuca-oil-uses-and-benefits

https://organicaromas.com/blogs/aromatherapy-and-essential-oils/7-amazing-benefits-of-frankincense-essential-oil

https://www.doterra.com/US/en/blog/spotlight-tea-tree-oil

https://www.aromatools.com/pregnancy-safety

https://www.doterra.com/US/en/pregnancy-essential-oils-presentation

https://naturallivingfamily.com/how-to-use-essential-oils-for-oral-health/

https://draxe.com/peppermint-oil-uses-benefits/

https://draxe.com/orange-oil/

https://www.doterra.com/US/en/blog/spotlight-doterra-serenity-restful-blend

Through the Pain: The essential oils I used to help me work through the pain and grief of miscarriage

Miscarriages…

Lets talk about it!  I’ve mentioned before that I have had quite a few of these. The first time I was scared out of my mind but I had already given birth once and figured out immediately what was going on. What I did not know was that I had to go to the hospital for it to make sure everything came out

– yes I am going to talk about it, so if you are already getting woozy, than you had better turn away. (If you have just recently had a miscarriage and you are still processing, I suggest scrolling to about mid post where I start talking about how I processed, Ill put a big break in the post so you know where to go this first half is stats, and some ranting that probably isn’t going to help you at all) But it’s the idea that we cant talk about it that had me hide my first one from EVERYONE including my doctors for years!-

Since I didn’t know, I didn’t go. My best friend/roommate/sister from and another mister was the only one to find out about it a week later when she finally dragged me out from the hole of sorrow and misery I made for myself. The second time was different, I was with my husband and we were trying desperately to have a child. Because of our constant monitoring we found out we were pregnant about 1 week before my period, but a week later my period came and with it some of the worst cramps. We went to see the doctor the next day who did a pregnancy test, but because my HCG levels were still high enough I was told I was still pregnant. Unfortunately they were not cramps and I was not still pregnant, I was having a miscarriage. I found out 2 days later when I went back to the doctors to double check. My husband and I both were devastated, we had already been trying for so long and our first shot died before it even started, so needles to say it took us a while to get ourselves together and try again. When we did though it happened again. This time I figured out what was happening almost right away. Everything that happened the last time was happening again. I had a positive pregnancy test (which i decided not to share right away and wait until I missed my period), but a week later the cramping, backaches, and bleeding were all there again too. I was super embarrassed. We had told everyone about the first pregnancy too early, and then had to give everyone the bad news, and now less than a year later, I was supposed to tell them my body had killed another. All of my male centered societal thoughts came jumping into my head “as a woman I’m supposed to have kids and I cant even do that” “what if he leaves me because I cant have kids” “what will his parents think of me” "what will my parents think of me?"“My entire body is built around having children and it cant do it, what can I do?” “It must be a sign that Im a terrible mother” and so on and so forth, and that’s when I started researching, more about miscarriages.

Did you know:

• 70-75% of all fertilized eggs fail to implant and end in miscarriage
• 31% of implanted eggs end in miscarriage
• 10-20% of all confirmed pregnancies end in miscarriage with 80% happening in the first trimester
• After your first miscarriage, your odds of miscarrying during your next pregnancy go up 20%
• That number doubles if you’ve had 2 miscarriages to 43%

Most women, don’t even know they have had a miscarriage unless they are constantly testing (like we were). They fall into that 70-75%, or 31% because unless we are trying a lot of us don’t know to test until we’ve had a missed period, assuming we miss one because you don’t always miss your first either. Women who do know aren’t going to be sharing that news with everyone either, because weather we want to admit it or not the idea that our bodies cant do, literally the one thing a female body is designed to do is devastating.

*Side note and disclaimer: I am not saying that choosing to not have kids means that you cant do anything else. That is so very far from what I am saying. If you don’t want to have children and you want to do something else, go for it! I honestly believe you can do whatever you put your mind to, and applaud every individuals strengths and choices. Lets look at evolution though, the only way to continue a species and evolve is to have children, and lets look at the female body. The breasts we have are there to feed children. The vagina we have is there as an opening for the male counter part to begin fertilization.  I mean we’ve all had health class. I don’t need to go over the entire anatomy but here’s something you may not have known. Women on average have worse circulation than men, – this is why we are always colder and have higher heart disease rates and such- but did you know that this is because our circulatory system was designed to get blood to our womb before the rest of our body. Granted if you are not pregnant the blood isn’t going to stay in your womb or anything, but it still passes by there first just in case. So yea as a female your body is physically designed to do 1 thing, have kids- everything else you do is extra.

On top of physiologically not being able to do what we are meant to do, we are raised in a society that tells us we should have kids (I’ve already stated that I am not for this idea and do not support it, but it’s the reality in which I and many others grew up in), so now we feel we aren’t suitable for society  either. This can be devastating and heart breaking.

What I can say is that after taking the time to REALLY let myself heal, and becoming ok with the fact that having my own child may not be a possibility, life became a whole lot easier, and the healing process sped up. I never gave up hope or stopped trying, but I also became ok with the fact that no matter how hard I tried I would always have a greater risk of not giving birth to my own child than some other women. If you are a fighter like so many of us who wont give up click here to read some of the things my husband and I did to help increase our chances.

Here’s how I dealt with the pain.

First of all, know that you are not alone. Here are some websites that talk about the normal emotions and reactions we have after this kind of loss:

http://americanpregnancy.org/pregnancy-loss/miscarriage-surviving-emotionally/

http://unspokengrief.com/

Did you know there are online and in person support groups, and events/meetups:

http://nationalshare.org/

http://www.pregnancylossdirectory.com/support-groups

Along with finding support from others, I needed to allow me to help me, and regain some faith in my abilities. I am a huge fan of holistic health, specifically essential oils, so here as some of the ones that I used.

         Console:

Console is a blend of frankincense resin, patchouli leaf, ylang ylang flower, labdanum stem/twig, amyris bark, sandalwood wood, rose flower, and osmanthus flower blended to help you close the door on sadness and take your first steps on a hopeful path toward emotional healing. It promotes feelings of comfort and hope and counteracts negative emotions of grief, sadness, and hopelessness.

I used this anytime I felt the overwhelming need to cry or when I just felt sad, which lets be honest was more often than not. For the first month this was used nonstop. Anytime I felt I needed a hug, but wasn’t somewhere where I could get one, I would apply console. I applied it to my pulse points, so on both wrists, on my neck and over my heart.

      Cheer:

Cheer is a blend of wild orange peel, clove bud, star anise fruit/seed, lemon myrtle leaf, nutmeg kernel, vanilla bean extract, ginger rhizome, cinnamon bark, and zdravetz herb that can counteract negative emotions and provide a boost of happiness and positivity when you are feeling down. Everyone knows a bright disposition and cheerful attitude can smooth over many of the bumps and challenges of life, right? But, sometimes no amount of positive self-talk is enough to avoid the blues. Its sunshiny, fresh, optimistic aroma will brighten any moment of your day by promoting feelings of optimism, cheerfulness, and happiness, and counteracting negative emotions of feeling down, blue, or low.

I used cheer in combination with motivate (ill cover this blend next) anytime I had to leave the house and be around people when I just really couldn’t stomach it but felt obligated to like work. I would put cheer behind one ear and motivate behind the other to help motivate me to be cheerful around others when really I wanted to curl up in bed with a pint of ice cream and a warm compress.

3.       Motivate

Motivate is a blend of peppermint plant, clementine peel, coriander seed, basil herb, yuzu peel, melissa leaf, rosemary leaf, and vanilla bean absolute which replace negative emotions like guilt and pessimism, with feelings of confidence and courage. It will help you find the courage that comes from believing in yourself again. It promotes feelings of confidence, courage, and belief while counteracting negative emotions of doubt, pessimism, and cynicism.

I used motivate in combination with cheer by applying cheer behind one ear and motivate behind the other to create a pleasant aroma that was therapeutic to me as well. Honestly I had little to no motivation for the following 1-3 months after each loss, so motivate became a part of my daily routine to help get me out of bed and focusing on other things.

4.       Balance:

Balance is a blend of spruce leaf, ho wood leaf, frankincense resin, blue tansy flower, blue chamomile flower, and osmanthus flower essential oils in a base of fractionated coconut oil designed to create a grounded feeling of calm and wellbeing, bringing harmony to the mind and body, and balance to the emotions. It promotes a whole-body sense of relaxation, helps ease anxious feelings, and evokes feelings of tranquility and balance.

I used this everyday as a mood stabilizer. I would apply it to the bottoms of my feet as well as in my deodorant to my armpits (PS it smells pretty good and doesn’t irritate sensitive skin areas like armpits). I discovered this oil blend with motivate just wasn’t enough. Balance is a mood stabilizer so all feeling of anxiety and or depression were stabilized with this blend, which then aloud me to feel the effects of Motivate and Cheer more fully.

5.       Forgive

Forgive is a blend of spruce leaf, bergamot peel, juniper berry fruit, myrrh resin, arborvitae wood, nootka tree wood, thyme leaf, and citronella herb to create a renewing blend that helps to counteract emotions of anger and guilt, while promoting the liberating feelings of contentment, relief, and patience. It promotes feelings of contentment, relief, and patience, while counteracting negative emotions of anger and guilt. When you are ready to move forward, this blend of tree and herb essential oils will help you discover the liberating action of forgiving, forgetting, and moving on.

This was a big one for me, that I didn’t even know I needed at first. Once I had taken the time to realize that a lot of my residual grief was coming the fact that I was blaming myself for the loss I had to confront this and let my self heal from it. I am not a big bath person, but Forgive baths became my thing. 30-45 minutes at the end of the day in a hot bath and 1 drop of forgive in the bath with another drop in the diffuser (sometimes I would add console or peace to the diffuser a well) and I would just let myself cry. Not the crazy cry that can make things worse a cry of release that ends with more clarity. Sometimes there were no tears, just deep contemplation in remembering what happened, and coming to terms with it. Forgive helped open me up to moving on from the pain and being ok with myself again.

6.       Peace

Peace is a blend of vetiver root, lavender flower, ylang ylang flower, frankincense resin, clary sage flower, marjoram leaf, labdanum leaf/stalk, and spearmint herb used to promote feelings of contentment, composure, and reassurance when anxious feelings overwhelm your emotions. This oil is a positive reminder you don’t have to be perfect to find peace. It promotes feelings of peace, reassurance, and contentment while counteracting anxious and fearful emotions. Slow down, take a deep breath, and reconnect with the composed, collected you. Everything turning out fine begins with believing it will. *side note- this blend also helps promote fertility.

This is one that I would use in conjunction with balance on pulse points (wrists and neck) to help calm my haywire emotions and help me find some peace within myself. I later found out that a side effect is increased fertility, and so this became a long term oil for me to help improve my chances of conceiving.

7.       Hope

Hope is a blend of fractionated coconut oil, bergamot fruit, ylang ylang flower, frankincense oil, and vanilla bean absolute designed to uplift your mood with a bright, fresh, scent.

I used this once I was ready to try again. I applied it to my neck and wrists not only as my perfume, but each time I smelled it, I was reminded that I have another chance.

If you are struggling with loss or grief you can contact me through this blog or privately through my website www.beyoutfit.com and I will help you find the tools you need to process your emotions and help you find peace. This is not an easy thing to process alone; let me help.

Here's where I got the statistics used earlier (yes I know its a blog, its also doctor reviewed)

https://www.verywellfamily.com/making-sense-of-miscarriage-statistics-2371721

Essential Oils for Fertility

We are pregnant! Wow it feels good saying that out loud. It’s been a long time coming honestly.

I am not the most fertile of beings to begin with, but after the complications and surgeries of my last pregnancy my chances of bearing children again diminished more. So three miscarriages later, we have finally made it to the second trimester of a pregnancy without any hiccups and we couldn’t be happier.

Through this journey I have found so many couples who are/were struggling with having a child of their own fertility treatments are an option which seemed super costly for us with the purchase of a new house and all the expenses that come with having the child once born. Adoption is option we talked about for a long time, but due to circumstances surrounding my oldest daughters’ father we were denied. Surrogacy was also an option that we had started to consider but hadn’t quite decided on whether we wanted to ask a stranger through an agency or someone we knew personally. Being that we needed a female surrogate though we knew that we were running the chance of the surrogate mom deciding to keep the baby which was a heartbreak I wasn’t fully ready to swallow yet, and so we kept trying on our own.

I write that because I am an advocate for exploring all options, and if circumstances had been different my first choice was to adopt. I feel that there are so many children who are already alive and on our earth who need a loving home that had my family qualified I literally would have tried to take them all in.  Anyway, if you are like us and you haven’t decided on another option or no other option is an option for you, then here are a few things that you can try at home that we used, and you can too.

Let me start with a quick disclosure though because the products I am about to mention are not FDA regulated. So let me confirm that I am not a doctor, or a chemist, or a fertility specialist of any kind. No one is paying me to write what I am writing, and none of these facts have been checked by the FDA. What I will do is provide links to articles and additional material so that you can do your own research. The information given in this post is not meant to take the place of doctor treatment or recommendations and I always recommend that you ask your doctor before trying any thing new. Essential oils, just like many other things can interfere with medications and treatments and should not be used without your doctors consent.

Increasing Fertility in Women

Before you begin trying a bunch of products, start with the basics. Learn to track your period and ovulation cycles Use this link form the womens health center to help you find the best ways to do so: https://www.everydayhealth.com/womens-health/tracking-your-menstrual-cycle.aspx

Also keep in mind that staying healthy is a huge part of fertility so exercise, eat right, and avoid toxic situations. - Honestly this can become a much bigger issue than you expected because of the recent studies on how cosmetics and synthetic fragrances can cause infertility. Here’s an article about it:

https://naturalfertilitybreakthrough.com/infertility-prevention/are-your-cosmetics-making-you-infertile/

or if your not a big research reader, try watching STINK. (If you want any help in reducing the toxic load of your cosmetics, perfumes or cleaning supplies, Ill add a link below.)

Do not lose hope. For a lot of people it takes about 1 full year to conceive. If you have been trying for over a year or if you have had 1 or more miscarriages,  then you should talk to your doctor about your options, but wait until its been 1 year first.

1.     Clary Calm

This is an essential oil blend made with Clary Sage*, Lavender, Bergamot, Roman Chamomile, Cedarwood, Ylang Ylang*, Geranium*, Fennel*, Carrot seed, Palmarosa, and Vitex. The oils I put an * next too are well known for increasing fertility in women so if you don’t have this blend you can use any or all of those individually to help. Clary calm blend helps to regulate hormones during your menstrual cycle and keep your cycle regular in order to help increase your chances of implantation at the right time, and keeping your hormone levels high and ready. This blend can also be use by women who aren’t looking to get pregnant as well or in conjunction with birth control to help regulate hormones for those of us who suffer from painful periods or bouts of PMS, acne, or tender breasts. Clary Calm should not be used once you are pregnant however due to the clary sage which can cause contractions (unless of course your trying to induce and your doctors says its ok).

I used this blend daily. Every night before bed I would roll it over my lower abdomen and let it soak into my skin completely before having sex, or going to sleep.

2.       Phytoestrogen

Almost every function in a woman’s body is controlled by hormones. Estrogen and progesterone are particularly important hormones for women and will influence a woman’s good health and emotional well-being throughout her lifetime. High estrogen production in young women can result in significant issues related to menstruation, while the production of too little estrogen as a woman ages can impact many aspects of a woman’s reproductive health and can be a contributing factor to the health challenges that some women experience during and after menopause. Balancing healthy estrogen levels will help minimize monthly hormone swings and the hormone fluctuations associated with menopause. This product is complementary to, but not a replacement for, hormone replacement therapies.

I took 1 of these every day with dinner, and 2 on days when ovulating (yes we tracked ovulation as well)

3.      LLV

LLV stands for Life Long Vitality which is a 3-part multi-vitamin. If you are trying to have a child and you are not taking a daily multi-vitamin, you should start. If you want to start taking prenatal vitamins, that is also a great option. Personally, I am not a fan of prenatal vitamins because of the size of them and the fact that you have to take them with food (sometimes I don’t have an appetite first thing in the morning, but I still need to take my vitamins before I leave the house). The LLV has a “tummy tamer” blend in all three parts which allows you to be able to take them without food. I also liked this because it came as a vegan option, and although I am not a vegan most baby books will tell you to try to get as much of your nutrition from raw plants, so this seemed like the perfect fit for me.

Part1- Vegan Microplex MVZ: This formula includes a balanced blend of essential antioxidant vitamins A, C, and E, and an energy complex of B vitamins presented in a patented glycoprotein matrix. It also contains chelated minerals including calcium, magnesium, and zinc for optimal bone and metabolic health, and is encapsulated using sodium lauryl sulfate-free vegetable capsules.

Part 2- Alpha CRS+: This is a proprietary formula combining potent levels of natural botanical extracts that support healthy cell function with important metabolic factors of cellular energy. It is to be used as a comprehensive dietary supplement foundation for a lifetime of vitality and wellness.

Part 3- vEO Mega: This is a revolutionary, 100 percent vegetarian-friendly formula blending CPTG Certified Pure Therapeutic Grade essential oils with natural, plant-sourced essential fatty acids.

Start slowly with ½ dose 1 of each in the morning and 1 of each in the evening. Do this for at least 1 full month before switching to the full dose: 2 of each in the morning, and 2 of each in the evening.

Increasing Fertility in Men

Don’t forget ladies and gents that although many women will feel as though it must be there fault, the ability to produce a child takes 2. If you aren’t sure, you should check with a fertility specialist. Men can get the same warning I gave the women. Before you go trying abunch of products, start with educating yourself on what can help increase fertility naturally. Low sperm counts or poor sperm motility may be due to environmental toxins such as chemicals, radiation, drugs, heavy metal exposure, cigarette smoking, excessive alcohol use, street drug use and pollution, and avoid hot baths, showers or hot tubing before intercourse. Men can also be effected by toxic overload from plastics and fragrances so reduce your toxic load. Make sure you are getting proper exercise and nutrition.

For more information on reducing the toxic load of your hygiene products or household cleaners I will post a link below.

1.       Vitamin C and Zinc

For men, the most important supplemental nutrients to enhance fertility are vitamin C and zinc. Vitamin C (2,000 to 6,000 milligrams daily) helps prevent sperm from clumping or sticking together, thus improving the chances for fertility.

2.       Sandalwood

The use of sandalwood oil may help in dealing with sexual dysfunction in men. This oil also helps in igniting the sexual desires of a man. In case a man is battling with low testosterone levels, the use of sandalwood oil may prove to be helpful.

3.       Frankincense

In a study conducted in 2007 on rats, it was established that the use of frankincense oil not only increased the sperm density but motility too. However, there is no substantial evidence on humans available, but it is believed that it helps in increasing the sperm count.

4.       Marjoram and Sage

In a study conducted in 2015 on rats, it was observed that the use of marjoram and sage effectively improved the male fertility. It not only helped in increasing the sperm count but also improved the testicular structure of the rats. Another reason for infertility in men is obesity and the use of these oils help in battling the effects of obesity on the male fertility.

5.       LLV

LLV stands for Life Long Vitality which is a 3-part multi-vitamin. If you are trying to have a child and you are not taking a daily multi-vitamin, you should start. Taking  multi vitamin is the start to estabilishing a healthy nutritional balance in your life that is needed when you are trying o conceive. The LLV has a “tummy tamer” blend in all three parts which allows you to be able to take them without food which is really nice for people on the go.

Part1- Vegan Microplex MVZ: This formula includes a balanced blend of essential antioxidant vitamins A, C, and E, and an energy complex of B vitamins presented in a patented glycoprotein matrix. It also contains chelated minerals including calcium, magnesium, and zinc for optimal bone and metabolic health, and is encapsulated using sodium lauryl sulfate-free vegetable capsules.

Part 2- Alpha CRS+: This is a proprietary formula combining potent levels of natural botanical extracts that support healthy cell function with important metabolic factors of cellular energy. It is to be used as a comprehensive dietary supplement foundation for a lifetime of vitality and wellness.

Part 3- vEO Mega: This is a revolutionary, 100 percent vegetarian-friendly formula blending CPTG Certified Pure Therapeutic Grade essential oils with natural, plant-sourced essential fatty acids. Nothing can do hormone regulation as good as omega 3 fats and DHA, which is termed as docosahexaenoic acid. These are highly essential for good ovulation in women. Found in judicious quantities in salmon fish, it is, however, necessary to avoid fish with high mercury quantities, such as tuna or shark. There are supplements available in the market that increase your chances of getting pregnant and, once done, can still be beneficial in improving brain development of the fetus.

Start slowly with ½ dose 1 of each in the morning and 1 of each in the evening. Do this for at least 1 full month before switching to the full dose: 2 of each in the morning, and 2 of each in the evening.

Increasing sex drive

People who have been trying to concive for a while typically run into issues with desire. Sex becomes almost like a chore. The first thing I want to address is that you do not need to eliminate all sex other than just when you are ovulating. Even with the best technological readings of your peak ovulation, only have sex during that time can actually lower your chances. You want to have sex on those peak ovulation days but having sex the week before and or week after can help improve your chances. This is because sometimes the egg is moving slowly, and sometimes the sperm can stick around for a while searching for an egg. Another thing that tends to happen is that in seeing sex as a chore it does not become fun, and while there are still debates as to whether or not a female orgasm helps increase fertility, it sure will help to keep sex enjoyable and fun for both partners. Keeping these things in mind, here are a few essential oils that can help increase your desires and get you in the mood

1.       Neroli

Essential oil derived from orange blossoms instead of the fruit's peel is called neroli, a precious and very useful oil. In one clinical trial, researchers found that “inhalation of neroli oil helps relieve menopausal symptoms, increase sexual desire, and reduce blood pressure in postmenopausal women,” making it another helpful option when libido is low due to hormones or stress. Neroli actually helps fertility in 2 ways. Not only will it increase sexual desire for women, but it also helps to reduce stress, and improves cortisol and estrogen concentrations.

Application: Diffusion or inhalation a couple of times each day for calming, balancing effects.

2.       Rose

As an anxiety-relieving, calming oil, it comes as no surprise that rose essential oil is also traditionally used as an aphrodisiac. As a pricey oil, though, rose is most efficiently used in blends or heavy dilutions.

Application: Blend into a perfume to carry this romantic floral scent with you, or diffuse periodically throughout the day for both partners to enjoy.

3.        Jasmine

A precious and pricey oil derived from delicate flower petals, jasmine has proven itself well in studies. Researchers tested alertness and “behavioral arousal” after a topical treatment of jasmine oil. The participants were found to be more refreshed, with their senses on alert.

Application: Apply jasmine topically in a perfume or sensual massage oil for men and women. Note that the delicate petals sometimes require the use of a solvent to extract the oil. Check labels carefully, especially for an organic certification.

4.        Ylang Ylang

Ylang Ylang is widely used as an aphrodisiac throughout the aromatherapy world and is one of the best essential oils for sex. Its gentle floral scent is appealing to nearly everyone, and its application potential is diverse. Enjoy with other floral oils or deepen the fragrance with sandalwood.

Application: Diffusion, inhalation, or diluted into a carrier oil as a massage oil for both men and women.

5.        Fennel

As a whole herb, Fennel seeds have been reputed to increase milk secretion, promote menstruation, facilitate birth and alleviate the symptoms of the female climacteric, increase libido and alleviation of the dysmenorrheal symptoms. Fennel essential oil retains some of these estrogenic effects, making it a beneficial addition to your libido-increasing, hormone-balancing diffusion or massage blends.

Application: Include fennel essential oil in DIY lotion blends or massage oils for balancing effects.

To relieve the stresses of every day life, boost libido and begin to ignite a spark with your significant other, try this libido boosting blend diffused:

2 drops neroli (or sweet orange)

2 drops jasmine

2 drops ylang ylang

When it comes to essential oils for sex, ylang ylang, clary sage, and rose are go-to oils that can be safely used as long as their dermal cautions are observed and make great options for massage oils.

-For either ylang ylang or jasmine, use 2 drops per tablespoon of carrier oil.

-For clary sage, use 6 drops per tablespoon of carrier oil.

-For rose, use 1 drop per tablespoon of carrier oil.

As with anything you want to make sure that you are using the best that is out there and also getting the most out of your dollar. Most essential oil companies are not honest with consumers about what is really in their products and you could end up using something that is not even an essential oil, much less a pure therapeutic grade essential oil. Choosing the right company for your essential oils is important. If you are ready to switch to more natural products and REDUCE YOUR TOXIC LOAD as well as be guaranteed that your ESSENTIAL OILS ARE PURE CERTIFIED THERAPUTIC GRADE, then this is the time to start.

You can visit my website: www.beyoutfit.com

Find me on facebook: Colleen Faye

Let me know that you’re interested in making some changes to your life and Ill help you get started with a free consultation and an online class on essential oil basics.

Here are some additional links to where I got my information and where you can read more:

·         https://draxe.com/neroli-essential-oil/

·         https://www.everydayhealth.com/womens-health/tracking-your-menstrual-cycle.aspx

·         https://www.verywellfamily.com/does-female-orgasm-boost-your-odds-of-getting-pregnant-1960265

·         https://essentialoilexperts.com/essential-oils-for-fertility/

·         https://www.tomakeamommy.com/perfumes-harms-fertility-non-toxic-phthalate-free-options-bonus-diy-recipe/

·         https://naturalfertilitybreakthrough.com/infertility-prevention/are-your-cosmetics-making-you-infertile/

·         https://thepeopleschemist.com/air-fresheners-cause-infertility/

·         https://stinkmovie.com/

·         https://www.alive.com/family/6-ways-to-boost-male-fertility-naturally/

·         https://parenting.firstcry.com/articles/20-home-remedies-to-boost-fertility-in-men-and-women/?ref=interlink